Intentional Emotional Aftercare

It’s important to talk about what we know about our own reactions to various stimuli before we are actually experiencing those reactions. It’s especially important because during intense play, we will sometimes experience unexpected reactions, so at the very least, we should prepare our partners for the reactions we know we can anticipate. When play gets emotionally intense, what do you need afterwards? Some of us need to be left alone to process our reactions in peace so we can discuss things later, some of us need to quiet our thoughts and go immediately to sleep, and some of us need to talk about what happened right away. Some of us just need space to talk, others might need to be asked questions in order to help us say what we need to say. These are important conversations to have. If things get emotionally intense for you, what signs should your partner watch for? How should they expect you to behave afterwards and what, specifically do you imagine you might need from them? Even if you turn out to need something different from what you expected when the moment comes, having had the conversation beforehand can make it easier to have a different conversation now. To claim this quest, have a serious conversation specifically about your reactions to deep emotions during play, and whatever you know about what kind of aftercare that might entail. (This applies to D-types as well as s-types, as emotions happen on either side of the slash during play!) (If you could use some guidance having that conversation, check the Resources page in the forum for a worksheet that might be helpful.)